Date Night
Date night is something that Rod and I began as a weekly event when we first started seeing each other about 10 and a half years ago. It was the one night we were child free and we would go out for a romantic dinner followed by a few drinks at one of the local pubs, The Bull and Bush.
Move forward 10 years and date night has evolved into an event that now attracts a group of our friends. I am not quite sure it is “date night” anymore but it is a good chance for us to catch up with some of our mates, have a bite to eat, a few beverages and share a few laughs. Date night is Thursday night at the Winston Hills Hotel. There is no RSVP involved. Date night is now an institution for a small group of our friends.
This week’s date night was probably the first one that has not involved me drinking. Due to my clean eating plan it required some preparation. I knew exactly what food I was going to order and I knew exactly what I was going to drink. My fellow “date-nighter” Maxine is joining me in this 30 day detox so we gave each other moral support. There were no issues. We passed the test with flying colours.
It was great to wake up on Friday morning and attend my PT session without feeling hung over. I am starting to like the feeling of not drinking.
The food is another issue. I have been really good, sticking to my program, but it is difficult. I find myself craving to eat something that I can’t have. I need to learn how to switch my brain over, to distract myself from that craving because it does pass quickly. However, the temptation to just cheat a little is always there. We are talking about cheese and bread here – I can’t imagine how hard it must be to give up a smoking or a drug addiction.
Getting back to date night, I think it is important as a couple to make some time for each other. We get caught up in our day to day lives, doing the things we have to do. Often, we forget about spending time with those who are most important to us. As we get older, the kids become less of a constraint to spending time together, but we still lead fairly separate lives for the majority of the week.
I am incredibly dedicated to my work. If I am not working, I need to be doing something (housework, study, exercise). I really cannot sit still for very long. When I do get a few minutes to myself I have no clue what to do with them. I can always find a productive way to fill those minutes. The alternative is that I use alcohol as a method to move me into a relaxed state and I know that there must be a better answer. This is a challenge I am dealing with in this new alcohol free state.
Rod is the yin to my yang. His life is not as busy as mine and he often drags me out of my frenzied work state and grounds me. He encourages me to relax and be present. Putting the phone away when we are together on date night is an example. No distractions. I am there to be a couple and a friend, not to be an accountant.
In my opinion, date night without alcohol made the night better. I can’t say I won’t be drinking on date night after the 30 days, but I do intend to keep the drinking to a minimum. I want this detox to be the start of something that makes me better in the long run. Thanks Rod for supporting me in this and I am already looking forward to a sober date night next week.